Quinn Weber
Period 3
9-23-09

Zion

Skagway City School is in a deplorable state. Student enrollment is dropping as fast as government funding. These two figures are linked symbiotically for as enrollment declines funding plummets the low funding in turn leads to dilapidated facilities and second rate educators which discourage new students and scare current pupils into nearby Haines or Juneau. This devastating negative flow of students must be stemmed so as to create an environment in which quality education is given. Furthermore an increase in student population would boost the athletic clubs of Skagway school brining pride and honor to the community. Surely the one who could bring such glory to the city would be worthy of praise.
Every Sunday millions of believers flock to the nearest or most well funded altar, temple or church to proclaim their faith to the heavens. In Skagway there is an especially large population of those of the Mormon faith. The Mormon faith is one of the youngest and as any Christian will tell you, as Father Ignacio told me, any religion under 1000 years old is merit-less. After searching for thousands of years for their holistic city of Zion a Mormon father assures me, his people are tired and in need of change.
Skagway will be the answer to their prayers.
Why can’t our lovely town become “Zion”? Our beautiful mountain enshrined, sea bordered town has all the makings of a holy city. My friendly father from Utah assures me that if I could get 2 more congregations to agree to name the city “Zion”, His church alone could facilitate the transportation of 2,000 Mormons. He agrees to such a plan because he sees the advantage in it for himself. With the Mormons happy in Skagway, not only does room in the overcrowded church of Salt Lake City open for new converts, his coffers are filled by the thankful Mormons who rediscovered faith in their religion in “Zion”. The Mormon clergy will also gain capital by receiving the donations from newly opened Mormon businesses in Skagway as Mormons above any other religion kick back the majority of their salary to the church. The church will most importantly gain something which has plagued it, an official holy city, and capital. Thus Utah will form an express way to Skagway, Skagway will gain population and the church will gain the cash and needed to expand.
The fact that the Mormon Church will gain fiscally is the main reason why this plan will succeed. Church members follow their clergy, if you doubt this you need to look back to the crusades in the closest history book. I am not requiring their followers to rid the holy land of infidels in the course of seven long wars, I am only asking them to give the holy land a physical location.
The Mormon faith has no problem adjusting to Skagway; they have already flocked and flourished here. Perhaps it is some ancient form of fate which has drawn them in such numbers, perhaps deep down they already believe this place is Zion. Whatever the reason it is undeniable that Mormons are naturally attracted to this place. They constitute roughly 1/3 of the total population and 3/5 of the total school population. The reason for this seemingly large population has never been found.
The new population would of course have children. Mormons especially travel in large family units. In fact the average Mormon family contains 8 family members while the average Christian family has only 4. This means that not only would Skagway increase in population, it would do so without developing incredible amounts of new land. A Mormon family of 8 would live in one household where 8 Christians would typically live in two separate households. So savings on land could be in excess of 100% of that developed!! These children must be educated, the tight-knit and driven structure of a Mormon family demands a good education, Skagway school has a monopoly on the market, and the children will be raked in like leaves in autumn.
The Mormon Church is on our side, the Mormons themselves have no reason to doubt the city, and there is much to be gained and nothing to be lost. All we, the people of Skagway must do is encouraged the change, help to build the Mormon churches, to expand those already established, and to spread the word of Zion.
Some nay-sayers claim that I am a Mormon advocate concerned not with the betterment of Skagway but with the spread of the religion. I myself follow no religion Christian, Mormon, Judaism or any other which I could name. Furthermore I have never in fact set foot inside a Mormon temple thus my services can not be tainted by religious preference or any influence which a church may have on someone.
Undeniably these new religious folk will help boost Skagway young population and stop the faltering numbers in school. Their large family sizes will increase student population while minimizing the effect on Skagway’s physical and environmental footprint. With the boost of new bodies, the school will receive new funding, which will allow higher wages for teachers, two part desks and ipso facto higher test scores. Mormons like no other race or religion need a place to call home.